If you are committed to becoming a Leader, or in the process of developing your leadership skills, you have to stop the I, I, I speech.
Let me say this in the simplest way possible… (pausing for suspense purpose)… Leadership isn’t about you!
Matter of fact, Leadership is about developing people around you, help them overcome their self imposed boundaries and stand by their side as they step out of their comfort zone.
With that said, if you are willing to be the catalyst in the growth of people around you, then you’ll have to adequate your speech as well as your attitude to serve that intent.
help them realize where they are – coaching would be the best method. The purpose is to make them realize what their current situation is, are they living up to their potential? Have they achieved their goals? Are they living the life they planned?
point out the abilities and potential you see in them – most people stop evolving or investing in their own growth because they stop believing in themselves, because they lose vision or because they become conformed with their situation. They are prisoners of their comfort zone, and sometimes all it takes to get them back on track, all it takes to set them free is to let them see themselves through the eyes of someone else, through eyes that see them as they once saw themselves: full of potential, a diamond in the rough.
and then gently and patiently build a vision – you’re helping them getting from point “a”… out of point “a”! It’s not up to you to tell if it’s point “b”, “c”, “d” or “e”! They’ll be the ones setting the goals, otherwise they won’t buy in to them, you just have to help them realize that they can go a long way if they just dare take the first step.
Now, considering that the process is about them, how could it help if your speech was a I, I, I speech?
How would you be helping by saying “I would do this”, “I did this and that”, “I could”, “I am”, “I used to”. Wouldn’t that transmit the idea that people should be like you? Wouldn’t that be stilling the stage, and make leadership about you instead of the person you’re talking to? What if the person you’re trying to help doesn’t share your ideals or your way of living? Don’t you think this kind of speech would turn away people instead of getting them involved in the coaching session?
You have to put your ego aside so there is plenty of room for others to grow! And who knows, maybe, just maybe, without so much I, I, I, there is much more You, You, You…